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Mama Drama: Top 10 Parenting Tips (plus 1) for New Moms and Dads

Dear Mama Drama:

My husband and I are the proud parents of a newborn baby boy. We are so excited that he is finally here, but have a lot of uncertainty about how we’ll handle all the day-to-day challenges of parenting.

We would love any tips you have for new parents.

~New Mama

(photo credit)

Dear New Mama:

Congratulations on your new baby! The journey of parenthood is full of questions (many of us are still searching for that owner’s manual we are certain we misplaced at the hospital!) and the answers are often different depending on the child.

My top 10 parenting tips for new moms and dads:

Top 10: How you know your husband is obsessed with growing The Great Pumpkin

With Mother’s Day behind us, let us turn our attention to the men in our lives. I adore mine. He is a doting husband, attentive father and brilliant businessman. The only weakness I’ve found in him happens to weigh 1,000 pounds* and consumes most of his spare time.

So in honor of him and fathers everywhere:

Top 10: How You Know Your Husband is Obsessed with Growing The Great Pumpkin

10) You sneak up on your husband on the computer and the only lurid sites you have to worry about him viewing are BigPumpkins.com and his pumpkin blog DenverPumpkins.com.

9) While most people are making their pilgrimage to the local garden center with the intention of planting food they can eat, your husband is prepping the soil for his inedible 1,000-pound fruit.

8) During the off-season, your husband has a grow room reminiscent of certain other sketchy growers.

7) a)Your family vacations are planned around The Great Pumpkin and you are banned from taking trips during the two-week pollination period. b) He refuses to join you on a family vacation to visit HIS family because it means too much time away from The Great Pumpkin.

6) Your husband builds hoop houses that contain heaters to shield The Great Pumpkin from the early-season weather.

5) Your husband carries around a digital temperature gauge and even sleeps next to it so he can constantly monitor the temperature in the hoop houses.

4) The only designer item you possess from Italy is his hail netting.

3) You become a widow for the duration of pumpkin season as your husband spends at least an hour a day and many weekends in the patch.

2) Your husband convinces you to invite all your friends to have a Pumpkin Party to commemorate the official vine cutting. And they like it.

1) You discover the most random things, in the most random places. From this in your guest bathroom window….

To your nice dinner plates covered in muck on the floor of your car. And when you confront him?

“Jamie, can you please explain why there were dirt-covered plates in my car?”

“Yeah, because I put dirt-covered plates in your car.”

At least he’s not in denial.

What is the father/husband/significant other in your life obsessed with?

*If you’re just tuning in to this saga, be sure to read Sordid Secrets and the Husbands Who Keep Them.