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Parenting: How to Say “Yes” as Much as Possible

Dear Mama Drama:

I have noticed recently that anytime my husband or I say “No” to our three-year-old daughter, a huge meltdown ensues. Even if we are saying, “No, not right now, but later,” she still throws a tantrum. We find ourselves in power struggles or giving in and are at a loss for what to do.  (photo credit)

How can we help her handle not getting her way right away with a little more grace?

Mama Drama: Anniversary Advice Round Up

Mama Drama is celebrating two years with Mile High Mamas!!

We’ve rounded up all of the drama Lisa has covered during that time into a variety of categories to make it easier for you to find that special nugget of information or advice you need.

Keep the questions coming ([email protected]) and remember that we all have our share of Mama Drama, so contribute your advice, ideas, and tried and true strategies as we support each other through the journey of motherhood in this fabulous community of moms.

Be sure to bookmark this page for easy access and share it with all your mommy friends!

Developmental issues:

Articulation Angst – When to worry about speech concerns.

Mama Drama: Tantrum Trouble

Dear Mama Drama:

My six-year-old son is struggling with anger. He is often very frustrated with his sister or us when he doesn’t get his way and every little thing leads to extreme outbursts. He screams, yells, hits, and throws things. When we try to get him to calm down he yells no and stomps off.

His sister never went through a stage like this, so we don’t have the benefit of experience. We are feeling at a loss as to how to help him and are becoming exasperated with his tantrums.

~Totaled by Tantrums

(photo credit)

Dear Totaled:

Dealing with tantrums is definitely exasperating. Your son sounds like he is feeling miserable as well. When children throw tantrums they are trying to communicate, but are doing so very ineffectively. They can also get into patterns of reacting to situations and struggle to know what to do instead.

You have recognized that your son is frustrated when he doesn’t get his way, so this is a good place to start. Work with him before hand, when he is calm, on strategies for handling his frustrations differently.

What does he get the most frustrated by and

Mama Drama: Toddler Tantrums and Clean Up Meltdowns

Dear Mama Drama:

My three-year-old daughter is driving me crazy! I love her to death and she’s got so much spunk, but when I need her to get things done and she refuses or throws a tantrum and I am at a loss. She could care less about consequences and seems to enjoy all the attention she gets from lectures. I seem to be the only one frustrated in this situation.

~Going crazy

http://www.flickr.com/photos/citril/ / CC BY 2.0

Dear Going Crazy:

Three can be a challenging age as children seek more independence and challenge expectations. They often run on their own time schedule and our demands can appear random and unreasonable to them.

Creating a daily visual schedule can help your daughter to understand the routine of the day. If something needs to change for that day, you can change the picture or sequence of the schedule and discuss that with her ahead of time. Three-year-olds also respond better when we explain, in developmentally appropriate language, why the change is occurring.

Provide transition warnings for your daughter when you are asking her to stop a preferred activity. Depending on her needs you may want to use several warnings at five minutes, two minutes, and one minute. When she does not want to do a task, using first-then statements and/or visuals can also help. “First bathroom, then snack.” Showing her a picture of what she needs to do and what is next in your routine can also motivate her to make that transition. Having the preferred activity in the “then” spot is most effective.