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A Bold Prediction for Adoptive Families

Even though the Berlin Wall fell suddenly a quarter-century ago, hastening the end of the Cold War, in hindsight we were not all that surprised. Historically we note that of course people eventually throw off shackles. Of course the human spirit cannot be contained forever. The human spirit is hard-wired to reach for light, to yearn for freedom, to crave openness. And settle for no less.

adoption and barriersSo we just closed out National Adoption Awareness Month, I make a bold prediction for adoptive families and the birth parents who helped form them: the walls that still exist in adoption will fall not gradually and softly but in a rush. A shocking, thunderous rush, just like we saw nearly 25 years ago in Europe.

It’s coming — mark my words: openness in adoption will be here within the decade. We’ll wonder how we ever tolerated anything less.

So what are these walls in adoption?

Strength Baby Strength

Formalities first. The phone hasn’t rung. We’ve received zero
emails. Nothing. No news. Nada. How does that make us feel? Don’t
really want to talk about it. Or think about it really. It just is. There’s nothing we can do to speed it up or force the issue. And so life as we know it goes on. Most of the time, it goes on very happily. And during the times where it’s not so happy, we gain more strength in the now.

Ever wonder what it’s like to be a pregnant woman choosing a family
to raise your child? Ever wonder what it’s like to carry a little one
for 9 months, knowing that you won’t comb her hair or brush his teeth
or walk, hand in hand, through parking lots? I never did until we met
dude’s birth mom. Until we started meeting strong people who make the
unbelievably difficult decision to let their kids be raised by some one
else. Someone they typically don’t really even know. Below is a story
from an anonymous author off a site I follow religiously. You’ll
definitely want to check her out…she finds moms from every walk of life and tells their stories. And then some. She’s Design Mom – give her a read.

Adoption Story from Anonymous:
“I didn’t want to get pregnant. A crazy night with an emotionally
physical goodbye led to what I didn’t know then would be the hardest
goodbye of my life. It was the summer of my sophomore year of college
at a very small private liberal arts college. I was working two jobs to
pay for the next semester’s tuition. I had loans for the air I breathed
and was always struggling to make ends me