Summer is fragile. It slips by at a dizzying pace. One moment, you are emptying the backpacks and stashing them out of sight.
The next, you’re filling a shopping cart with enough washable markers to decorate the exterior of a family band bus. It’s a good thing the Partridge Family didn’t use washable markers, or a rainstorm may have re-named them Pad Fail.
Take good care of your summer. It breaks easily.
Here’s how to break a summer:
1. Pack every day on the calendar with something to do. Summer derives it’s super-powers from large doses of Nothing.
2. Visit Target or Walmart’s seasonal department. There will be school supplies for sale on or around July 1st. Avoid! Avoid! Avoid!
3. Be a pucker-mouthed sourpuss and say no to the ice cream truck. Yes, It costs a fortune but you can plan it like you plan for college. Put away spare change and stray dollars in a jar during June and July. When August arrives, chase the truck when you hear it the first time. Go on a frozen treat spree of legendary proportions. If the ice cream truck drivers have a trade magazine, you may find yourself on the cover.
4. Fail to roast a food item on a dirty wooden stick.
5. Not find yourself in a porta-potty at least once. This desperate act signals you are at: a festival, parade, rest stop, farm field. Good for you! Porta-potty use means you have a life.
6. Deny kids the audacious fun of running through splash-park fountains in their street clothes. Unless you are on your way to a wedding, funeral, or parole hearing, it’s harmless to get a little or a lot wet. Water evaporates quickly in this climate. Like summer.
7. Complain loudly about the price of watermelon.
8. Say “next weekend” over and over and over when asked when you’ll mini-golf, go to the water park, have a garage sale/lemonade stand.
9. Panic if you have some lazy TV-fest days of slothful nothingness.
10. Compare your summer to other people’s sunshiny experiences. You may not be taking the All-American road trip or pitching for a major league baseball team or having a beach-set romance with a young John Travolta. But you have a jar of change on the ‘fridge and you can already taste those orange creamsicles.