“Behind every great child is a mom who’s pretty sure she’s screwing it all up.” – Unknown
Parenting doesn’t come with a manual. There is no perfect guidebook for you to refer to, a parental encyclopedia to look up that unknown little fact you need the answer to, no map that charts a child’s life to give you a sense of direction, and certainly, no magic wand to ensure everything turns out just as it should.
Recovery from substance addiction is a little like that too.
With both of these huge challenges that life has delivered to your doorstep, to a certain degree, you just have to wing it, and rely on your mind’s intuition and wisdom to simply do its best. Yes, no all-knowing manual to guide you, but always remember, help is always close by. You just have to reach out.
According to the National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism, around 25% of children in the U.S. under the age of 18 experience alcohol abuse or dependence in their families. Sadly, some of these will become addicted adults themselves.
But you can change all that. With your parental love and desire to guide and positively impact your children’s lives, the future you now hope for is ready waiting for you. It’s waiting for your children too. Here are our best gems of advice for parenting in recovery (and yes, you can do both of these right now – just remember to reach out…).
#1. Your Oxygen Mask First
Concentrate on your recovery (that’s you putting your mask on first). This is, by far, the most positive way of being in the best place to be the parent you want to be. With recovery, comes energy, a clear head every day, and time – time to be a parent. Whether you’re in outpatient rehab in Denver, or another program elsewhere, remember – without recovery, you will find being the best mom a near-impossible task to achieve.
#2. Recovery & Home
These are two separate things – try to keep them that way. Focus on your recovery during your program and meetings, but, when you’re with your children, focus on them, and focus on the right now.
#3. Your Kids’ Feelings
Remember, your children might be confused, even a little angry at you. That is fine, absolutely. Encourage them to talk about these feelings, to share them with you. If your emotions get the better of you, before you do anything – reach out. To a friend, a sponsor, or someone in your program.
#4. The Fun Stuff
Your kids are kids, and they need to play, laugh and horse around. To an extent, you do too. Having fun, smiling, laughing – these are great medicine for the mind, and they’ll do wonders for your own motivation. Making time to do this is important too, so that it becomes part of your parenting routine.
Parenting & Recovery
At this moment in time, these two challenges should be your absolute priorities – being the best mom you can be, and staying clean and sober so you’re in the right place to do exactly that. Always remember to reach out for help when you need to. We wish you well!
In partnership with Mile High Mamas.