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Hello Kitty not a real cat? Gretchen reveals her real mom!

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I first heard it on the Today show this morning: Hello Kitty is not, in actuality, even a cat.

I wondered if my entire life was a lie?

Apparently I wasn’t the only one and be sure to check out our beloved Gretchen’s hilarious post about the matter.

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Late last night, the news broke. The internet went wild. Bafflement ensued. The masses learned Hello Kitty is not actually a Felis catus sporting a Redis Hairbowis near her pointy little ear. Many expressed shock and wonderment at the news. Of course Hello Kitty is a cat. She has ears and whiskers! Next, you’ll be telling us that Goofy is not a kangaroo.

It turns out Hello Kitty is a third grader named Kitty White.

As I read about Hello Kitty, it slowly dawned on me. I am the mother of Hello Kitty. Of course, there are a few inconsistencies but the main facts are this:

~ Beatrix is in third grade. So is Hello Kitty.

~ Beatrix’s nickname since birth has been “Kitty Cat” or just “Kitty.” In fact, we call her “Kitty” more than we call her Beatrix sometimes. I wake her up every morning by saying, “Kitty, time to get up Kitty-girl!”

~ Our last name  CLICK TO KEEP READING

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Comments
  • comment avatar marta August 28, 2014

    What’s next? Teenage mutant ninja turtles aren’t really turtles?

  • comment avatar Amber August 28, 2014

    Maybe they’re not even really teenagers either.

  • comment avatar Marta August 28, 2014

    I long doubted they weren’t mutants.

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