Anyone who blogs or writes is probably a control freak. We write to bring order to chaos. To understand the mystifying. To get people to do something, even just to agree or disagree.
As any of the three people who live with me will attest, I fit nicely into the CF category.
One evening while driving home, I noticed a stunning sunset over the mountains. The clouds had rolled in, and created a canvas on which the sun painted various shades of pinks, blues, purples, and all hues in between.
This sunset happened without any impetus from me.
So I started thinking about other amazing processes and events that I don’t have to influence. They pretty much happen when I just go about my business. Here they are in all their random glory:
- My digestion, respiration and other bodily functions happen without a lot of controlling on my part.
- When I go to a store expecting to buy certain things, 99% of the time they are there.
- Neighborhood streets are clean and passable.
- Trees shade my house.
- Water evaporates, becomes precipitation, hits the earth only to evaporate again.
- My husband comes home every night.
- My children keep growing taller and wiser, no matter how I might thwart their efforts.
- Sunrises and sunsets like this happen all over the world every single day!
Truly, I am part of something much grander than I. I can relax. I don’t have to try so hard.
Now if I can just remember that today. All day. Every moment.
Or is that too controlling?
What event in the last 24 hours did you not have to control at all?
(Image from Wikepedia under GNU Free Documentation License.)
Author: Lori Holden
JoAnn
This is a great post, Lori! It’s a nice reminder to let go what we can’t control. Ironically, I have to work hard at that sometimes…some days, more than others.
You listed great ones, but one that always shocks me a little is when my daughter goes to school. I have NO SAY in where she sits or what she does. She listens intently to teachers and does what she’s told, even without me hovering or peeking in with a watchful eye. She works through her own challenges, and for 2.5 hours, she really is her own person. I’m not sure who is getting more out of her school-time…her or me. 😉
Laughing Yoga Mama
Hit the nail on the head!!!
I think it’s all about letting go rather than holding on. Easier to say than do, but keeping it in the forefront of our thinking is the key. That and being gentle with ourselves when we don’t. 🙂
Lori in Denver
You’re right, JoAnn. It was so strange to go from knowing almost every thought and feeling your child has to having a 2.5 hour gap in that knowing. And that they do just fine without you!
LYM, I like what you say. Especially the reminder to be gentle with myself.
Amber Johnson
I did not have to control bedtime. I literally passed out and had absolutely no say in it. 🙂
Suzanne (Crunchy green Mom)
In the past 24 hours I had no control over:
*My exhaustion… it was, it existed, nothing I could do until I fell asleep
*My daughters being in love with Alice in Wonderland
*Nightmares, my kids have them no matter what, I can only give love after.
*Sports, my kid is addicted to it all, weight lifting, football, discus.. anything that involves muscles and testosterone, he loves it all.
Lori in Denver
Amber, that’s one of my favorite surrenders.
Suzanne, that’s a great list. Except the nightmares must be harrowing for you all :-(.