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Good Wrinkles

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“Don’t make a bad wrinkle, Momma.” Claire said to me, out of the blue. “Make a good wrinkle!”

“What?” I asked her, confused.

“A bad wrinkle! You have a bad wrinkle,” she said, pointing to my forehead. “Make a good wrinkle!”

I couldn’t help but smile, because I’d actually figured out what she meant, and I was shocked that she’d noticed.

“Like that!” she said in approval. “Yes. That’s a good wrinkle!”

She was talking about the two little vertical lines I get between my eyebrows when I frown, and she must correlate those with Momma not being happy.

Luckily, our life is full of happiness and laughter, but sometimes I frown without even knowing it. Sometimes I frown for obvious reasons, but sometimes I frown when I’m concentrating or when I’m confused. Even with all the laughter, do you know how much concentration and confusion surrounds me and my preschooler? A lot. Apparently. I’ve not stopped concentrating, and I’ve learned to roll with the confusion, but I’ve been consciously working on raising my eyebrows.

You see, I get horizontal wrinkles, “good wrinkles,” on my forehead when I raise my eyebrows. And, those good wrinkles are a sure sign that I’m happy.

What they say is true: When Momma ain’t happy, ain’t nobody happy.

Kids are so perceptive. They see things we don’t even see in ourselves. I furrow my brows when I concentrate. I furrow my brows when I’m frustrated. I furrow my brows when I’m angry.

And, those are bad wrinkles. Nobody wants bad wrinkles.

A lot of this goes hand in hand with things I’ve learned from my previous lives. The Social Worker in me is always cognizant of showing an open stance. Crossed arms are not welcoming. A nodding head is comforting. Looking people in the eye, depending on which eye you look into, can give people a sense of calm or can be seen as a subconscious act of aggression. Use it wisely.

The Sales Director in me smiles a lot. I always smile when I’m on the phone. The person you’re talking to can hear a smile.

Almost everything I ever learned in college and from my previous jobs can be applied to my job now: Full-time Momma. Part of me had forgotten the importance of some of this stuff, but it all came crashing back into my head when it was revealed to me that I had a bad wrinkle.

Seeing these ingrained habits of mine in print makes it sound like my every move is calculated…but it’s not. After years of doing these things, they just become second nature. But, apparently, I was starting to slack in the Bad Wrinkle Prevention Department.

And, the last thing I need is more wrinkles…let alone bad ones.

Author: JoAnn

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  • comment avatar Terra March 3, 2009

    That was agreat post, and your daughter is VERY perceptive! I love it.

  • comment avatar Amber Johnson March 3, 2009

    “Bad wrinkles.” Kids are so perceptive, aren’t they? Fun post, my dear!

  • comment avatar Wendy March 3, 2009

    And to think some people buy expensive cream or submit to needles to get rid of wrinkles. Your way is much better.

  • comment avatar kagey March 3, 2009

    It’s so easy to forget ourselves with our kids. I remember the day I was thinking “I’m alone” when I was with my kids. I’m not in private, I have three very attentive pairs of eyes watching me!

  • comment avatar Jess March 3, 2009

    She is a very, very smart little girl.

  • comment avatar Lori in Denver March 3, 2009

    Kids teach us more than we give them credit for!

    Or at least remind us of what we know.

  • comment avatar Momma, The Casual Perfectionist March 3, 2009

    Terra, thanks! I’m amazed at how perceptive she is sometimes!!

    Thanks, Amber! Needless to say, “Bad Wrinkles” is now a catch-phrase around our house!

    Wendy, only a preschooler would see a difference between good and bad wrinkles, huh? 🙂

    Isn’t that SO true, Kagey!? What’s funny is when you see your child doing something that you know you do, but you don’t realize you do, until you see them doing it. Good or bad. Ack! 🙂

    Thanks, Jess! She never ceases to amaze (and amuse) me!

    Lori, it’s amazing to me how many things lie dormant until they are brought to the surface by our own little personal mirrors.

    Thanks for the comments, ladies!

  • comment avatar Empress March 4, 2009

    That’s why botox is so popular my friend…

  • comment avatar Momma, The Casual Perfectionist March 4, 2009

    Empress, that’s so true! I almost said something about botox, but I didn’t!! 🙂

  • comment avatar Bonnie March 4, 2009

    I’m wishing for you many good wrinkles….. what a cute thing for your daughter to say. Kids are so honest.

  • comment avatar Catherine March 5, 2009

    You’re right about smiling over the phone, too. I speak to my son over the phone a lot and he always seems to be able to tell when I’m distracted, sad, angry, sick… his perception even when we aren’t together is a bit scary!

  • comment avatar Momma, The Casual Perfectionist March 5, 2009

    Thanks for your comment, Bonnie! I’m well on my way to getting wrinkles, so they may as well be good ones, right? 🙂

    Catherine, that’s a good point! I haven’t really talked to my daughter over the phone yet (she talks to everyone else over the phone, but I’m usually with her), but you’re right! Their perception doesn’t stop with face-to-face interactions.