Month: November 2007

Blur

The top five signs I need glasses: 1. I keep mistaking ubiquitous-in-Colorado cars with ski racks for police cars. 2. I was behind a car and thought I saw an Irish Setter in the back seat. It turned out to be a girl. 3. Every piece of lint or fuzz on the carpet is a spider, until proven otherwise. 4. Repetitive squinting, to the point people believe I have permaglare. 5. Was that Osceola or Oneida I just passed? I think everyone has an aging milestone.

On Feeling Worthy

Once, while waiting outside the office building where I worked in New York, I was mistaken for a hooker. Or possibly a drug dealer. I’m not sure which. All I know is that I was waiting for my husband Kyle – who had rented a car on the other side of town – to come pick me up so that we could head through the tunnel and down the turnpike to visit my parents. And I had been waiting…and waiting…and waiting…and apparently it looked like I was loitering. For a little too long. (I’m pretty sure my knee-high black leather boots didn’t help my image much either.) A cop approached me

Coming Full Circle

My mom is going to grin ear to ear when she reads this. When I was a child, my mother had a particular way of correcting my grammar. She basically pretended she didn’t hear me and/or didn’t understand me when I spoke inappropriately. IT DROVE ME ABSOLUTELY NUTS. Aimee: “Me and Jenny are playing with dolls.” Mom: “Who?” Aimee: “Me and Jenny.” Mom: “Who?” Aimee: (Exasperated). “JENNY AND I.” This the part where my mom starts grinning.