I know! I had no idea they were there either. It’s almost like they sprouted out of nothing.

Well, they kind of did. Brent Christensen started building these magical ice castles three years ago, and brought to life something that was previously backyard fun with his children. Now, he has created 25 foot sires pretty much right next to our outlet mall up the hill. Only a little drive outside of Denver. Crazy!

My family was invited to visit the Ice Castles in Silverthorne right before New Year’s, on a day of 50-degree weather. So, while I was able to take off my coat photographing the place, the crew was worried about melt. Because it is all man-made, icicle by icicle. They grow sticks of ice for building material, add more and more to the structures every day, spray with water at night, and let nature take its course. Which, in my mind, make the Ice Castles a bit of nature-made as well. Case in point, all that warm weather while we were there changed the shape of the castles even in that one day, and as Brent and his staff rebuilt, temperature and snowfall will dramatically change the shape and texture of the icicles every week, for the rest of the winter.

Icicle Farm

Ice Castle Building

I had some really really really good light that day, even if the heat was bad for the Ice Castles.

The other part of the experience is… NIGHT.

Low heat lights are wired into most of the structures, which put on an amazing display when the sun goes down. I put on my snow pants and just sat there with my camera. What else could I do?

Personally, I feel like night is the most magical at the Ice Castles. And what a perfect thing for apre ski? The place itself is not huge, you spend your time walking around and marveling at the crevices. We stayed at Keystone Resort, which was only 10 minutes away – so I can totally see coming off the slopes and heading there afterwards to catch the light show.

And you can go too!

CONTEST

Mile High Mamas is thrilled to give away FOUR family four-packs of tickets to the Ice Castles in Silverthorne. Please go here to enter. Contest deadline is January 26, 2012.

INFORMATION
The ice castles are located on the lawn at the Town Pavilion, in Silverthorne, Colorado on the east side of the Blue River Parkway. They are less than 1/4 of a mile from the I-70 Freeway.

Monday – Thursday 11:00am to 9:00pm
Friday – 11:00am to 10:00pm
Saturday – 10:00am to 10:00pm
Sunday – Closed
Hours are subject to change based on demand and weather, watch their website for updates.

Tickets are sold on-site, and the prices for entrance are as follows:
Adult one time pass – $10.00
Child one time pass (12 & under) – $7.50
Child under 3 years – Free
Adult Season Pass – $30.00, unlimited use
Family Season Pass- $50.00 + $10 for each dependent child, unlimited use.

I was in danger of losing my eyesight in January. I broke my finger in July. But, most of all, this year has been eclipsed by a strain of bacteria that invaded my ear during SXSW Interactive in March. Invasive Group A Streptococcus to be specific. The bacteria that killed Jim Henson, and without sounding too dramatic about it, almost killed me.

I spent 5 days in the hospital in Austin, had surgery there to avoid my ear from exploding into my brain. (I am not joking about this. I wish I were.) Feel behind your ear. There is a bone there that is a honeycomb called the mastoid process, which ventilates the ear and is very fragile. A strong infection like Strep A can bust though that like paper.

Lucky for me, I made it. I made it home, and spent several months fighting off the infection with big gun antibiotics. The net result? Severe hearing loss and a huge hole in my eardrum.

I got *some* hearing back, slowly. Certain tones picked up first, like high pitched dance beats that made me jump when they all of a sudden they came out of nowhere. While at the mall? I was a wreck. All the reverberation and voices and clamoring? Basically it was all one big sound to me.

Two weeks ago, I underwent one more surgery, where my eardrum was reconstructed from the back. The hope is I will regain almost all of my hearing in my right ear. If not? I will most likely wear a hearing aid for the rest of my life.

Which, honestly I am looking forward to, either way.

When you say to people at the store, “I’m sorry, I have hearing loss, can you speak up?” – 90% of the time the response is “It’s OK.” It’s OK? Wow. Yes, I really do get that people have auto responses, like how the waiter says, ” Have a nice dinner,” – and we all say, “you too.” I get that. I do. But my real beef is that most of them don’t actually speak up. And the interactions turn into a yelling match with me sticking my good ear into their personal space and we’re all totally uncomfortable.

Well, those are strangers.

What about when it’s your child?

Declan has been really, really, really annoyed with my hearing loss. He is a mumbler by nature, and has trouble keeping on point in a conversation. Meaning if you ask him to repeat something – he starts from the beginning. Which annoys the you-know-what out of me.

After the 50th rolled eye and big huff of the day recently, I pulled him aside… and… I tell you, I had had it.

“Would you roll your eyes at someone in a wheelchair?!?”

“Would you get annoyed if someone who was blind could not see your paintings?!?”

Sheepishly, with eyes brimming, he told me, “Of course not.”

THEN YOU NEED TO UNDERSTAND: I. CANNOT. HEAR. YOU.

CAN YOU HEEAAAARRR THAT???

Not my finest parenting moment.

But I think he finally gets it.

Don’t get me wrong. My kid is sensitive and kind. I think he fell into that trap of letting his guard down, where we always hurt the ones we love. He’s used to me a certain way – and the last year has been a struggle for all of us. He feels it. But we have friends with disabilities. He is considerate with them but also never thinks anything of it.

If I do indeed end up with permanent hearing loss, I hope that is how we’ll go on.

He’ll know how to speak so I hear him, but that’s just the way it is with me, and we move on.

_____________________________________________________________

Any suggestions?

Do you have family members or friends with disabilities?

How do you teach your children to be respect the disability without making a big deal about it?

I got pregnant in the infancy of the business. My husband Bryan had just come to work for us, but we made the decision that he would stay home once the baby was born. He did so for two years, and during that time, worked very little outside the home. We developed a new pattern. The schedule bended to me. Bended to my company. My meetings took precedence over his plans; if I had to work late, he dealt with it.

He came back to work with us as Declan entered preschool, but the pattern continued. His work was important and valuable – but we knew that my responsibilities had to come first. We knew that he was helping build the company by supporting my needs.

This is not to say that I wore the pants in the family. It just meant that in the ebb and flow of schedule, Bryan did the heavy lifting with Declan, and with the house.

In March, I sold my half of the company and am going out on my own. Instead of 35 employees, I have one. Me. And while my new venture is important to all of us, Bryan has a new venture too. He left my company last year to become a Creative Director for a software development firm. HE has become the backbone of the family. HE is the one we need to make time for now.

The first month was strange. I continued to make meetings and plan my day as I always have. The rude awaking was that I totally needed to change my mindset. Which is hard after 10 years.

But I have been trying. We now make sure *I* am the one to take Declan to school. Bryan tries hard to get out in time to pick him up, but if not, *I* am definitely his backup. I defer to him when planning our evenings, because he is working at night a lot these days. It’s been an adjustment for sure. Something I hadn’t really thought through when we decided to make this change.

I knew it would be a big transition. I just didn’t realize how big.

Have you had any transitions lately?
How have you coped or adjusted your lifestyle for them?

That day was no exception. One crappy song after the other played throughout our burger-and-salad meal, till finally we hit the motherload.

Amie by Pure Prairie League.

I nearly fainted. “Argh! I hate this song. The only ‘Amy’ song in the whole entire world and I am forced to listen to THIS garbage over and over my whole entire life.”

Bryan totally agreed. “This song belongs on The Soundtrack of My Own Personal Hell.”

And that’s how we eased our pain, laughing over the idea of a mix CD of songs we would play during the bus ride to hell. And then I realized, “No wait! Even better! It should be a CD you give the person you are breaking up with. A Breakup CD! Here are all the songs I hate more than than anything in the whole world, and I want YOU to have them!”

That got us through “Fly Like An Eagle,” at the very least.

What songs would be on your Breakup CD?

Photo Sourced from Flickr by Dianamite

I co-own a company that does health education research (and multimedia development around the research – that’s where I come in) and we try to help people in many different areas of health. One of our research scientists, Andrea Dunn, specializes in exercise for the treatment of depression. After having Casey’s post here on Mile High Mama’s, I asked Dr. Dunn to write a follow-up article for us, to help us understand possible signs of depression as our children grow.

I thank her for sharing this very important information.
- Aimee

___________________________________________________________________________

Recognizing Teen Depression
by Andrea Dunn, PhD
Klein Buendel, Inc.

Recently, the Journal of Adolescent Health published findings indicating that over 8% of children between the ages of 12 and 17 have experienced a major depressive episode, while one in 33 children have clinical depression (Mental Health America). According to the National Research Council and Institute of Medicine, the age at first symptom is around 11. However, the first diagnosis of depression is typically not until 15. Depression left untreated is linked to school failure, impaired social functioning, teen pregnancy, and suicide.

This means that it is important for parents to pay attention to changes in their children’s behavior and to listen to what they are saying, especially since it has been shown that counseling and resilience training may prevent the onset of depression disorders. By catching the signs of depression early, parents can advocate for preventative measures, which will enhance their child’s coping skills and resilience. It may also prevent the development of poor health outcomes and functional impairments, such as lower grades.

Adolescents may not show these signs of depression in the same way as adults and each child is different. Some teens may show signs of hopelessness, have a lack of interest in the things around them such as friends or family, or are unable to concentrate. However, other adolescents may express their symptoms through irritability and agitation. These expressions of irritability and agitation can manifest themselves in the form of being fidgety, restless, or move around more or less than normal. Or a child’s depression can be expressed in the opposite manner by isolating him or herself from others, playing video games, and spending hours watching TV or being on the Internet. While some of this behavior may be able to be written off as “typical teen behavior,” symptoms of depression are longer-lasting and turn these unusual behaviors into the usual behaviors and moods.

If you think your son or daughter might be exhibiting signs of depression, you can talk to you pediatrician/primary care provider, or contact your local community mental health center. Trained providers will be able to help you decide on treatment options. Two common forms of treatment are medication and talk therapy. A third option that has an increasing amount of evidence is exercise. Exercise may help to reduce depressive symptoms and may be a useful coping strategy.

If you are interested in learning more about an adolescent depression study in Denver that is looking at the role exercise can play in the treatment of depression, please contact the Project Coordinator at (303) 565-4321 x3673 or visit www.DOSEforTeens.org. The study is being funded by a grant from the National Institute of Mental Health.

Whatever treatment option you decide to pursue for your child, remember that treatment is a process of trial and error. If one option does not work, do not give up. Instead, pursue another until you identify the one that is the best match for your child.

References

• Birmaher B, Ryan ND, Williamson DE, Brent DA, Kaufman J, Dahl RE, Perel J, Nelson B. Childhood and adolescent depression: a review of the past 10 years. Part I. J Am Acad Child Adolesc Psychiatry 1996;35:1427-39
• Dolgan JI. Depression in children. Pediatr Ann 1990 Jan;19(1):45-50
• McCauley E, Myers K. The longitudinal clinical course of depression in children and adolescents. Child Adolesc Psychiatr Clin N Am 1992;1:183-96
• Rao U, Ryan ND, Birmaher B, Dahl RE, Williamson DE, Kaufman J, Rao R, Nelson B. Unipolar depression in adolescents: clinical outcome in adulthood. J Am Acad Child Adolesc Psychiatry 1995 May;34(5):566-78
• Rao U, Weissman MM, Martin JA, Hammond RW. Childhood depression and risk of suicide: a preliminary report of a longitudinal study. J Am Acad Child Adolesc Psychiatry 1993 Jan;32(1):21-7

Photo by D Sharon Pruitt.

If you have never even *heard* of the Denver Zombie Crawl, let me enlighten you.

Started 5 years ago by Denver native Danny Newman, the event has grown exponentially every year until this year’s event, held last Saturday in Skyline Park, was attended by over 7,000 of the walking dead. SEVEN THOUSAND! That broke a Guinness World Record, people!

I was there. It certainly was a TON of zombies.

Everyone gathers mid-afternoon, in the park, and OF COURSE, Michael Jackson’s Thriller is played, danced to, consumed, whatever – before the zombies are released on the 16th Street Mall. Then the Crawl begins in earnest.

There are creatures of all shapes and sizes, some scary, some funny – and even zombie “killers” to keep guard for the rest of us. And then basically we all walk up and down the Mall enjoying the sights of other zombies. (Plus, the enjoyment of people who weren’t expecting thousands of zombies, too). Oh! And people willing to be chased down wear huge X’s on their backs, so there is always some excitement as those folks are fake attacked by a zombie mob.

However, some of the most memorable sights are zombies doing normal, everyday things. Like making a call. While. dressed. like. a. zombie.

Seem scary?

It kind of is.

But it’s also great FUN, and there is lots of laughter.

We have been taking our son for several years, and he really got into the spirit this year. Yes, that is my timid little Declan on the right – all zombiefied.

Is the Denver Zombie Crawl right for you? You would need to think about your kids, their level of tolerance for such ghoulishness, and whether next year’s Zombie Crawl is something you ALL want to do. As a family.

But let me assure you. We’ll be there… and MANY, MANY, MANY other Denver families will there with us.

The pair were brought together for a cause they both believe in Project C.U.R.E. (Commission on Urgent Relief & Equipment) – which was founded right here in Colorado in 1987 to help meet the need for medical supplies, equipment and services around the world. I was amazed to learn that Project C.U.R.E. only has a 2% overhead rate. TWO PERCENT. Having worked in the non-profit world for 12 years, I can tell you that is AMAZING, friends. And they take the 98¢ left from every dollar they receive and turn it into $20 worth of medical supplies that are sent to developing countries in need. TWENTY!

Project C.U.R.E. started out delivering supplies to Brazil, and have branched out all over the world since then. The focus of the luncheon was, understandably, Panama. Ms. Martinelli spoke about the history of Panamanian public health, which I was surprised to learn, is tightly intertwined with the building of the Panama Canal. You see, before they built, they cleared disease. And then Panama used many of the principals learned to build their health system at the time.

Parts of the presentation were heart-wrenching, as they showed the conditions many hospitals are working with right now. And while I know we have many problems here, at home, in our country – I was reminded yet again how lucky we are.

When Declan was in the NICU – his NICU was not an open air room with a metal bedframe covered in a thatch mattress for him to lay in. His access to care was vastly different.

And as I listened to Mrs. Martinelli speak, to thank the organizers for selecting Panana as a recipient nation – I was thrilled that our little slice of the Americas was helping other little slices of the Americas. Mrs. Ritter talked about hearing a World Cup soccer announcer joke about a “home continent advantage” and she felt that Colorado was helping do that for all of North America through Project C.U.R.E.

Uplifting indeed.

What’s weird about being in the middle is you start having a parental role for not only your child – but also with those who raised you, those who smacked your bottom when you were bad (back when they did such things), those who dried your tears, those who taught you pretty much everything about life starting from the birds and ending with the bees.

It’s a slow process, of course. First your mom will email and ask your opinion on something. And you will look at the screen and think, “Whoah. Did my MOM, the one who gave me her hand-me-down Chevette 20 years ago really ask me if I think this other such and such is a good deal?”

Next is a harder transition.

They get sick.

Recently my mom had major heart surgery, and if that wasn’t traumatic enough – they accidentally found lung cancer. Accidentally. Like they were spilling soup.

The good news is, she came through the surgery well, and the doctors are optimistic about the lung cancer. Although I tell ya, it feels weird to type the word optimistic and cancer in the same sentence.

Either way – our adventures of the past few months have certainly not made my mother an invalid, but in many ways – it has made her a spectator in the management of her own life. My sister has become the patient advocate, taking copious notes from many different doctor’s perspectives, relaying them to me and other family members, fighting with nurses when necessary to ensure the best care possible for our mother. I flew in to be the cheerleader, a role I continue to hold as the helpless daughter who lives across the country, but wants to support her mother in any way she can from afar. There is also my aunt, who is eerily close with mom – a confidant for every single person in the family. She weathers ALL our storms combined.

The point being?

That feeling – the shift in care-taking with your parents is not something I ever thought about nor was prepared for. It is another aspect to illness that can take over if you let it – the struggle of power between mother and daughter.

Luckily for me, my mother is riding the wave of her illness with grace, humor and a dash of feisty.

It certainly makes it easier for me to keep going in my role as cheerleader.

Speaking of, do you know Ze Frank? He is another cheerleader, and I thought about this song today, paired it up with thoughts of my mom, and it made me smile.

This is a song that I sing when I’m scared of something, I don’t why, but it helps me get over it.

I started watching American Idol in its second season, long before I had this blog, pretty much right as I was having my son. And the funny thing is, I rarely watch TV. The exception being, you guessed it, American Idol.

Why do I like this show so much?

I have no flippin’ clue.

It’s silly. It’s over the top. It’s snarky.

OK, never mind, I just listed three AWESOME reasons to watch the show right there!

And when I started Greeblemonkey, the American Idol recaps started with it.

I even tried to stop writing them, but you all talked me back into it.

So, when Ford called me up and asked me to come, there was NO WAY I was not going. And I am SO GLAD I did. What a fun, wild, busy, crazy, insane couple of days it has been. Even including a scavenger hunt all over LA in a Ford Fiesta, details of which I will save for another day, because – honestly? At this point I only have enough steam to warble out my thoughts about the American Idol finale.

So here goes.

The Night Before

We flew in Tuesday evening, got settled and had about two hours before we were meeting up with friends from LA. So, what does one do when one is staying across the street from exactly where American Idol is being put on? Yes! One walks over and watches the scene!

And quite a scene it was. A ton of former Idols were standing around giving interviews, taking photos, and talking to the hordes of people hoping that they would do just that.

Pro tip! If you ever have the opportunity to attend an American Idol finale, study up on former Idols. I couldn’t remember a lot of their names.

Case in point: S-c-o-t-t M-c-I-n-t-y-r-e. Thank you, Google.

Some I just remember by the songs they sang. Case in point: B-o-h-e-m-i-a-n R-h-a-p-s-o-d-y.

And some you remember by their h-a-i-r.

Just kidding Jason! I remember you because I actually bought your album. And LIKED it, too!

We even had a producer for the show come up and ask us if we would like to attend *that* night’s show, ostensibly to fill empty seats? Unfortunately for her, we already had plans with two of the awesome Shutter Sisters, so we had to get going. The other thing we had to do was hang out in big red waterbed pods on the roof of the Standard Hotel.

SERIOUSLY IMPORTANT STUFF.

The American Idol Finale Show

As anyone who followed my Twitterstream knows, I was pretty much having a cow over what to wear to this thing. Well, I could have saved the conniption, because apparently some people think going to the American Idol finale ranks precisely the same outfit as going to Target. Those people are NOT ME, but somehow they got past the NO JEANS, NO SHORTS, NO T-SHIRTS, NO FLIP-FLOPS, IN ALL CAPS mandate that *I* received.

Neither here nor there, Danielle and I looked CUTE. And when I say CUTE, I mean REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY CUTE.

What You Don’t See On TV

There is a really long line to get in. Long long longity long long. Arrive early. Plan on waiting for everyone to check their cell-phones and cameras since they also seem to ignore the NO CELL PHONES OR CAMERAS, IN ALL CAPS mandate while they are ignoring the NO JEANS OR T-SHIRTS, IN ALL CAPS mandate.

There is a Fake Ryan Seacrest that warms up the crowd and talks to you during commercial breaks. This Fake Ryan gets the crowd pumped and gives away AT&T and Apple related products. Fake Ryan was pretty fun, although I did think it weird how little the Real Ryan interacted with the crowd.

There is a Loudspeaker Lady who cuts in with the count for when it’s time to go back live. Her voice is blasted through a different speaker system and it’s jarring, loud and hard to understand. So, I really should call her the Teacher From Peanuts Loudspeaker Lady.

All the judges leave their table at almost every commercial break. Particularly Simon and Randy. But, I have to imagine that Kara leaves more often in the regular season when she is not hampered by a 50-pound ball gown. And Ellen probably hasn’t figured out that she *can* leave yet.

Having said that, jokingly, Ellen and Kara in particular interacted with a little 6 year old girl that Fake Ryan plucked out of the crowd and brought up to them. That little thang was cute as a button, and it was sweet how awed she was by them, and everything going on with the show.

If you want the truth – we all were awed.

OK, back to the weird stuff. Get this.
Famous Person sings.
Famous Person end song.
Crowd claps.
American Idol cuts to commercial.
Stage hands run everywhere.
Photographer takes photo of Famous Person on stage with crowd behind them.
Famous Person awkwardly walks off stage in near silence.

NOT KIDDING!

This was particularly weird with Bret Michaels who (rightfully so) walked off stage bent over like a 95 year old man, and with Christina Aguilera, who was left to impishly extract herself from the lighting feature she sang from. By herself. I have to give her Awesome Real Person Points for that move, actually.

The Performances

We were about halfway back, and on the Simon side. Quite lovely place to be. No pressure from the pesky cameras, but still close enough to really see and enjoy. Which I obviously THOROUGHLY did.

OK, sure, at first I was a bit worried it was going to be Fuddy Duddy night, starting off with Barry and Robin Gibb, Hall & Oats, Chicago… don’t get me wrong – all of which were totally fun and I love, they are just such a totally different vibe than American Idol’s core audience.

“Core audience” being teenage girls, people who wear crap to awards shows, and … me!

But Christina Aguilera really did change the mood of the room. Sure she is a bit overly dramatic, but – like, whoah. I have watched a tape of the show from her performance – and you guys did NOT see the real deal that we saw in the room. Again. Like, whoah.

But the *REAL* whoah?

Oh My Janet Jackson.

She is a performer that I have always liked, but probably would never have gone to see in concert, as if she ever tours anymore.

THAT LADY ROCKED THE SOCKS OFF THE ROOM.

Her brother died last year? She broke up with her long-term boyfriend recently? Her weight has been up and down?

She brought all that, and poured into possibly one of the best live performances I have ever seen – ranking up there with James Brown and Stevie Wonder in my book. (Yes, I really have seen both of those gentleman live. And yes, they both were as amazing as you might imagine.)

If you haven’t seen it, the video is here – for as long as Idol will let it stay. However, as with Christina, the video doesn’t even come close to what it was like to be there.

Magical.

Saying Goodbye To Simon

The other reason I was excited to attend this particular show is because it was Simon’s very last. So, while the sentimentality was a bit over the top (but what isn’t over the top with this show??? -and P.S., that is a GOOD thing!), but it made the night extra cool. Especially when all those million trillion gazillion Idols came back on stage.

Two minor points, though. 1. Where were David Cook, Adam Lambert and Chris Daughtry? I have been reading various accounts of why they weren’t there, all of which are LAME. 2. Did Jordan Sparks and Kris Allen NOT get the memo about WINNERS WEAR BLACK, IN ALL CAPS?!?!?!?

Speaking of: The 2010 Winner, Lee Dewyze

Everyone I know in real life was a little stunned that Lee beat Crystal. But, all I can tell you is that Fake Ryan asked people during every single commercial break who they voted for – and every single one said Lee. The little girl next to me, also from Denver, also here (with her mom) for the Ford event, with the adorable “Crystal Sparkles” sign was not thrilled with their answers, let me tell you.

Personally, I could care less. I liked them both. They are both super talented and both will hopefully get to make the kind of albums they should, and will have successful careers.

As for me?
I will have an amazing memory of an amazing night.

___________________________________________________________
*Blogger disclosure: This trip was partially sponsored by Ford and the Ford Fiesta. They provided my hotel and tickets, I took care of the planefare. Because I really really wanted to go! Thanks, Ford, for having me! Cross-posted at Greeblemonkey.

Then I received an email that (politely) reminded me that *I* had reached out just the week prior looking for support for *my* bad parenting issues.

Ouch.

So I quickly added a “P.S.” to the baseball post, because I *did* see their point.

And I also realized there was *one* line in the post, the last line, that really made it about being a bad example for your kids – when I had intended the post to be about parents who use their kids as a “hallpass,” and when is that OK and when is it not.

I really really really want to go back and change that last line.

But is that kosher?

I know many will say, “Hey, it’s your blog, do what you want to!”

But I am not sure.

When does it cross a line of trust between you and your readers? When does it feel slimy? Or cheating?

I tend to write, reread, post. I rarely make drafts and obsess over them. Most of the time it is fine. I certainly go back and fix the typos and grammatical errors, of which there are PLENTY. But, to change the thrust of the post later? That just seems wrong for some reason. For me.

What do YOU think?