When Is It OK To Edit? Even When You Are Editing Yourself?
Last week, I had a post on my personal blog that described a very emotional struggle we all go through as parents – I went too far in an argument with my son. I felt really vulnerable, but everyone was super supportive. Monday, I wrote a more snarky post about a mom who expected ticketed baseball fans to give up their seats for her and her children, and I insinuated that she was setting a bad example for her children.
Then I received an email that (politely) reminded me that *I* had reached out just the week prior looking for support for *my* bad parenting issues.
Ouch.
So I quickly added a “P.S.” to the baseball post, because I *did* see their point.
And I also realized there was *one* line in the post, the last line, that really made it about being a bad example for your kids – when I had intended the post to be about parents who use their kids as a “hallpass,” and when is that OK and when is it not.
I really really really want to go back and change that last line.
But is that kosher?
I know many will say, “Hey, it’s your blog, do what you want to!”
But I am not sure.
When does it cross a line of trust between you and your readers? When does it feel slimy? Or cheating?
I tend to write, reread, post. I rarely make drafts and obsess over them. Most of the time it is fine. I certainly go back and fix the typos and grammatical errors, of which there are PLENTY. But, to change the thrust of the post later? That just seems wrong for some reason. For me.
What do YOU think?
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Um yeah, YOUR blog. If it was me, I’d leave it and add a comment or PS. I think for a lot of your readers it’s probably important for them to see your human side and understand that you recognized that you may have offended or misspoken.
My opinion is that it’s your blog, so you set the rules. And, because it’s your blog, you can change those rules with or without warning and without a committee vote.
If you want to stay true to your feelings in the original post, just do a follow-up “Reflections on Such-n-Such Post” or “Now that the dust has settled in my brain” post.
You can always Edit the original post to add a link to the new one, if you want. That way, you keep the original post intact but you add your own rebuttal.
I liked exactly what you did, the P.S. Because you really did mean it, I think, when you reached out the first time, and you really did mean it as well when you sort of snarked at the mother in your next post. No problem. We all have a hard time seeing ourselves. I didn’t see the conflict myself until you pointed it out. But the cool thing about blogs is the ongoing nature of the dialogue, and the dialogue nature of the dialogue. The fact that you realized (because someone else said it) that maybe there was another way to look at it, and let us all in on not only the first two post but that realization, was the essence of bloggy goodness.
And perhaps I should take a page out of your book. I ALWAYS make drafts and obsess over them. Not the most productive strategy.
Ha, and maybe I should obsess a little more, Kim.
All good thoughts – thanks friends!
I think such an acknowledged PS shows that you learn and grow. And that’s trust-building, too.
I like JoAnn’s suggestion. Leave the first post intact and do a follow up, with a link to it in your original post. We are allowed to change our minds. It is all part of growing as a blogger and a parent. I think we all will find in years to come that our points of view change over time and we will read back on our earlier posts and say, “I can’t believe I felt that way!” You have just had a change of heart a bit earlier is all.
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Have a lovely weekend.
Shelly