Are You a Cheater?
I’m totally cool with cheating. I am. My friend and I even had this discussion one week prior to THE incident.
Friend: I just get all uncomfortable.
Me: Well, THEY should FEEL all uncomfortable, not you, and if they were good enough in the first place they wouldn’t catch you with someone else. So, let them feel uncomfortable. Maybe then they will understand that they should have done better. RIGHT?
Friend: Ummm, okay.
I thought I was totally cool with it, until I got caught the other day.I guess all is well until you are in the same room with the one you cheated on and the one you cheated with. UGH!
I just wanted a hair cut that made me look a little more hip. I mean, the last hair stylist was good, he was, but I wasn’t all over the top in love with my do and to give me the benefit of the doubt, I didn’t really ASK for someone else, I just asked for the next soonest appointment.
I had some mean roots and a party in two days. What is a girl suppose to do?
So, there I was, the new (to MY hair) stylist walked me back to her chair when I passed him.
Him totally normal: Hi.
Me totally uncomfortable thinking that he is NOT HAPPY with me cheating: Hi.
I know, nothing amazing, but enough for me to realize I’m not the tough girl I thought I was. Just the other day I was talking smack about being wimpy and not trying someone new. What is so hard about walking right by the old stylist to the new one, trying someone new, testing all talents until you find the perfect fit? Just walk by, let them know you aren’t settling for mediocre, you want glamor, you want rock, you want bangs, you want color, you don’t want mom jeans and 80’s hairspray explosion bangs, you want the world and you ARE willing to go to someone else if the first stylist just isn’t doing it for ya. You are even willing to cheat.
Right?
I would say I’ve never felt so odd, but I’m awkward and clumsy. I feel odd a lot, but this was high on the list. His chair just happened to be smack dab next to the chair I was in. With each past tense hair question, I sunk further into this new seat.
Me: Uhhh, well, don’t come as often as I should, guess I want something different. I know, the roots are pretty bad, it’s been like, errrr, 6 months. No, not too short, but a few inches off would be great, you know, the split ends. Oh, I don’t know, you are the professional, not me. Just want something a little more hip. Yup, came here last time. Umm, actually, HE did my hair last. (Insert awkward point to the stylist next to us.)
Her: Oh. Got it.
She knew I cheated.
He knew I was cheating.
What is so wrong with it and why do I have to feel so bad? I didn’t marry my stylist. I didn’t sign a contract. Was my first dye job really life binding?!?!
I DID feel bad. I DID feel awkward. I DID NOT like that feeling. I was guilty; caught red handed.
However, I DO love my new hair. For me, the cheating was totally worth it.
The question is, why do we feel bad about these things??? Have you ever cheated on the person that does your hair, your nails, someone you feel you should of been committed to? Was the cheating worth it or did you end up with a mullet? Have you ever been caught and what did you do? Do you want to cheat and need the extra push? Tell me cheating on a stylist is okay!!!!
Guest blogger Holly claims to be clumsy, not good at mom things (sewing, knitting, huh?), and is an aerobic instructor, travel lover, and island girl at heart. She moved to the “Mile High” a few years ago from California, and blogs at What was I saying again? about her family’s life in Denver and the anomaly-that-is-snow.
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You are tooooo funny! I don’t have a regular stylist so can’t say I’ve ever cheated. However, I was really tied to a personal trainer and feel guilty that I just do my own thing now.
Holly,
First of all, I love your blogs. You are hilarious. I can just see you in all of the situations that you describe.
Second, I am your friend and a stylist. I totally get it. It is ok to try a new stylist until you find the right fit.
I hope that my repeat clients are those who come back to me because they know I am the best for them. I understand that I am not the right fit for every client and I want them to be happy with their haircutting experience.
I hear so many stories from people who say, “ive had the same stylist for years. I really dont love my cut/color, they are always late, kind of inappropriate, or whatever, the list goes on and on.” It just makes me sad to think that people can feel sort of bullied into staying somewhere they may not be their happiest.
Dont consider it cheating. Think of it as experimentation.
Emily
So many women right now are totally relating to that situation. I personally have gone through that so manny times because I am never happy with a haircut. Thanks for really putting that out there so we know we are not the only ones thinking that way!
GREAT blog as usual Holly!
Thanks guys! I guess ‘experimentation’ would be a better way to word it!
Hahahaha! That title is hilarious. Add the title in and you’re too misleading. It took me a minute to figure out what you’re talking about.
And no, it’s not cheating. Otherwise I’d be considered a hussy. :-)
you make me laugh! I’m guilty.
When I was in high school I wanted a job SOOOO bad. All the cool kids we’re doing it and my parents we’re all about me not wasting my time at a job when I school and sports but they thought wth and let me anyway. I totally wanted to be like Rachel and work in the little coffee shop. Lucky for me, Panera was opening up- in a little shopping center right by my house! Perfect!! I went in talked to the manager before they even opened… I filled out the form… he said he’d call.
Just like any other guy that says he’ll call… he didn’t call for weeks!
Ugh! when you’re 16 that is for-ev-er.
SO being the impatient 16 year old, I went to find another job. Luckily for me there was a drug store in the same shopping center. PERFECT!
I got a job there! the man from there called me…right away! even more PERFECT!
Perfect until Panera called me back saying I could get a job there a week after I started!
What did I do, you ask?
What any normal 16 year old would do…that’s what. I made my mom call the drug store and tell him she was making me quit because she wanted me to concentrate on school and my sports!
perfect again!
till my old boss walked into Panera for lunch.
Ouch. I felt horrible! I totally cheated and made my mom break up with my old job.
My religion — PresbyHAIRian — says cheating is a venal sin.
And you, my dear, are a hussy.
;-)
How awkward for you! Don’t you know the rules? Always make sure the other guy is OUT when you show up. Duh! ;)
No, I’ve never cheated. However, I have dumped a stylist and moved on without batting an eye. Ha! It’s not cheating if you officially give them the boot before hand. ;) Plus, I went to a totally different salon, just to give us each our space.
But, I just had a traumatic situation last week, when I found out that my stylist had left me. I was crushed. Luckily, I found another rockin’ stylist pretty quickly.
Hilarious! I agree…it IS awkward. But in the end, we did NOT marry the hairstylist, like you said. And furthermore, we PAY them to do what they do. So, it’s merely an exchange of services for money. Hmmm…sounds more like prostitution than cheating now that i think about it! ;-)
No it’s not cheating. vWe’ve gotten much too sensitive as a culture. I mean, is it cheating if you switch butchers? Or if you use a different piano tuner? Or if you sleep with a man instead of your husband? Of course not.
He he … cheating on your stylist. My mother was trying to get me to cheat on my stylist. I’ve been going to the woman for 20 years. I absolutely refused to cheat. I’m all proper and good like that … HAH!
blessings!
I dont know you, but my sister referred this story to me, because I have had a very similar story.
I didnt actually get caught cheating, but I did cheat on my hair dresser and got the worst haircut ever.
See below:
http://herestosecondchances.blogspot.com/2009/06/worlds-fugliest-haircut.html
At least you liked your hair! And my opinion is, you should be able to go to someone else, but have a good referral first!