The Kid Blender:  A Single Mom’s Attempt to Find Joy in an Unexpected Life
February 8, 2012 – 8:00 am | 3 Comments

In this series of blogs, the “Kid Blenders,” I will be addressing our challenges, trying to blend our two families together. The names of the children will be changed to spare the easily embarrassed. And let me be upfront about this: I’m no clinical expert. I’m just a single mom trying to figure life out as I go. But knowing that there are around 14 million single parents out there…I’m guessing that I’m not alone in this venture.

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Home » Humor

Imagination and Beyond

Submitted by on October 4, 2007 – 1:28 amNo Comment

Apparently I have given birth 15 times. At least that is what Declan tells people. That he has 14 brothers. Luckily for all of us, he is just expressing his creativity in that old tried and true way: imaginary friends.

They started appearing right after his 4th birthday. Right after he started at the local elementary school for preschool. He had been attending daycare since age 2, but this was full-fledged school… with big kids and big halls and big responsibility.

It was clear from the beginning that his imaginary brothers were a way to sort out behaviors he saw at school that he didn’t understand. They did things that Declan would never do. He described situations with such clarity we knew he wasn’t just making them up, he just didn’t know what to make of them.

Only a few of the 14 had names and there has always been one leader of the pack. His name is “Vo.” Where that came from, don’t ask me – but the other ones are a shifting mass whose names change at will. Vo is a constant.

Vo lies. Vo steals. Vo eats cats.

Now, I am seriously hoping that no one at Declan’s school is actually eating felines for lunch, but as each of Vo’s adventures come home, we approach them with aplomb. We talk about why Vo does the things he does. We talk about why we do or don’t do those things in our house. And our talks seem to settle Declan; make him understand the sea of kids he has been thrust into. As an only child, and an “old soul” at that, he seems to need an understanding of why people do the things they do.

And when it’s a disconnected entity such as Vo, I suppose it’s also easier to deal with.

Ever since my father-in-law passed away last Fall, Declan has also been grappling with the concept of death. So, lately Vo has been “dead.” I think it helps Declan get his head around why Pop Pop isn’t with us anymore, and is also sometimes a way to bring up discussion about Pop Pop in general. We are able to talk about how Vo, like Pop Pop, lives on in our heart and how we can bring him back by remembering him, talking about him, and looking at his photographs.

So, Vo is cool in my book. Anyone that helps me explain The Big Things like death to my son earns a special place in my heart. Even if he is a lying, stealing, cat-eater.





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